Responsibilities - Ephesians 6:1-9

The Apostle Paul in Ephesians 5 has been instructing us as to the harmony of the home. We've been looking at the different walks of the Christian life in Ephesians 4, 5 and 6. We've been told to walk in unity, to walk in purity, and to walk in harmony. Now the only way there can be harmony in the life and harmony in the home is through the power of the Holy Spirit. And this is why in Ephesians 5:18, Paul says, be not drunk with wine, but be filled with the Spirit. Now to be filled with the Spirit means to be controlled by the Spirit.

Our Godhead is revealed to us as a Trinity, God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. This is a mystery, but it's a great reality. God the Father has planned for our lives. God the Son has purchased all these blessings on the cross. And now God the Holy Spirit applies these blessings to our lives.

Now, if a man is going to be a good Christian, he's going to be a good Christian at home. It's going to start at home. You'll recall in Mark 5, when the Lord Jesus delivered a man from the possession of many demons. The man fell on his knees before the Lord Jesus and said, oh, let me go with you. He gave himself as a missionary volunteer. But the Lord Jesus said, no, you go home and tell them what great things God has done for you. And he did. And because of his witness, many were saved. Religion begins at home. Start at home.

And so Paul is saying to us in Ephesians 5, in this section that we have titled walk in harmony, Paul is saying to us, harmony begins in the home. When wives are submissive to the Lord, they have no problem submitting themselves to their husbands. When husbands submit themselves to the Lord, they have no problem loving their wives. When the same Holy Spirit indwells and controls husband and wife, there will be harmony in the home.

Now, the Holy Spirit of God works through the word of God. And he works through prayer. You've seen the slogan, which I fear has become a a cliché anymore, the family that prays together, stays together. It's very true that the Spirit of God works through prayer and through the word of God. So when you have the family altar, when the family gets together once a day and reads the word of God and prays, then the Spirit of God has something with which to work to bring harmony in the home.

Now, the Lord compares the church to a bride. Ephesians 5:25, husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it. The brides of the Bible make an interesting study. I recommend that you go through your Old Testament and find some of the brides of the Bible. Of course, the first was Eve. And Eve was made out of Adam's side while Adam was asleep. It's a beautiful illustration or type of our Lord Jesus Christ and the church. For when the Lord Jesus Christ was hanging on the cross, having given his life for your sins and mine, they pierced his side. And out of his side flowed blood and water. But the opening up of his side reminds us that one day, many, many, many ages ago, God the Father opened the side of Adam. And from that side, he made him a bride. The Lord Jesus Christ had his body opened on the cross that he might purchase to himself a bride, even the church.

You'll recall Rebecca. And you'll recall Ruth. Two other brides in the Old Testament. Rebecca loved a man she had never seen. The servant came and said to her, will you go with me and marry this man? She had never seen her husband. She said, I will. And she became Isaac's bride. Of course, Ruth is a beautiful type of the church. Ruth was a heathen woman. Dwelling in heathen darkness, but she made up her mind that she was going to follow the true way, the way of Jehovah. And she came to Bethlehem, you'll recall, with her mother-in-law. And there she married Boaz and became an ancestress of the Lord Jesus Christ. These brides are beautiful illustrations to us of Christ and his church, his love for the church, his sacrifice for the church.

Now, in Ephesians 6, Paul continues to apply this matter of walking in harmony to the home. He talks to the children. Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Then he quotes the commandment, honor thy father and thy mother, which is the first commandment with promise, because it goes on to say, and so shalt thou dwell long in the land which the Lord thy God hath given thee, that it may be well with thee and thou mayest live long on the earth.

Now, it's interesting that Paul writes to children. I think it's important that we teach children their responsibilities from the Bible. Now, if a child is not a Christian, of course, he's not going to feel any spiritual obligation to obey the word of God. But if a child is a Christian, we have every right and every responsibility to use the word of God in the disciplining of his life. I think one of the greatest mistakes we can make as parents is not to use the Bible in our homes. Not as a club to beat people over the head, but as a discipline, as a guide book, as food for the souls of the members of our family.

Now, the children are to obey, the wives are to submit, the husbands are to love. Now, when you have a family like this, you're going to have harmony. When you have children and husbands and wives and fathers and mothers who are obedient to the Lord, and who are led by the word of God, you're going to have harmony in the home. Now, of course, you may have some occasional differences. I think every family does. But they'll be easily patched up because love covers a multitude of sins. But where there's selfishness and disobedience and rebellion, there cannot be harmony.

I may be speaking right now to some Christian children. You live in an age of rebellion. It's not the old people who are rebelling today, it's the young people. Some young people don't know what they're rebelling against. And children are not to rebel. Children are to obey their parents in the Lord. In other words, back in Ephesians 5:22, wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as unto the Lord. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church. Children, obey your parents in the Lord. We do it for Jesus' sake.

Now, this is an important principle. If we live for our own sake, we're selfish. If we live for the sake of others, we're kind. But if we live for the sake of Jesus Christ and put him first in our lives, then we're spiritual. Honor thy father and thy mother. Give them the reverence and the respect that they deserve. When mother and father tell you not to do something, don't do it. When they tell you to do something, do it. When mother and father seek to instruct you in the ways of the Lord, listen.

Wasn't it Mark Twain who said that when he was 14, he thought his father was the most ignorant man in town? But when he became 21, he was amazed at how much the old fellow had learned. You may be amazed to know how much your parents know about life. You may think they're old-fashioned. You may think they're old fogies. You may think they're sticks in the mud. But you'll find out someday that Christian parents who pray for you and sacrifice for you are a great blessing.

Now, he says something to the fathers with reference to the children in Ephesians 6:4. And ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture, this means discipline, and admonition, this means counsel, of the Lord. Now, fathers and mothers have to be careful in the way they treat their children. If a father is filled with the Holy Spirit, he's not going to provoke his children.

Now, we provoke our children in many ways by promising things and not keeping the promise. Or by threatening and not keeping the threat. Sometimes our discipline is more words than works. And we also provoke them by a bad example. We tell the children not to lie, and yet if we lie, we're giving them a bad example. We tell the children to be obedient to the word of God, and yet if we're not obedient to the word of God, we're provoking them with a bad example. Discipline must be in love. Just as husbands are to love their wives, fathers are to love their children. And children have no problem obeying a father who prays for them, who loves them, and who sacrifices for them.

Now, strange to say, there are in some families children who just simply won't surrender. You can read this in the Bible. In the godly home of Samson. My, he had parents who knew how to pray, godly parents, and yet Samson turned out to be a reprobate. You had the prodigal son, good godly home, and yet one day he said, Father, give me the goods that falleth to me. I'm leaving home. And he went out into a far country and wasted everything living for the devil. Sometimes in spite of what people do and say and pray, there are children who are just incorrigible. All we can do is pray for them and leave them in the hands of the Lord. But I appreciate the promise that the Lord gives to us, that when children appreciate their parents and obey their parents, God blesses them. This is a wonderful thing to have one generation, two, three, four generations of a Christian home.

Now, he talks here in Ephesians 6:4 about nurture and admonition. Admonition means counsel, wisdom. We are to sit down with our children and teach them why things are right and teach them why things are wrong. Now, when children are very little, you can't do this. We teach them through outward discipline. They learn that they don't want to be spanked. They don't want to stand in the corner. They don't want to be deprived of their dessert or their television time. But as children get older, we have to reason with them. And so we have to use the admonition of the Lord, the counsel of the Lord.

Now, Psalm 1 says, blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly. Children by nature will listen to the counsel of the ungodly. They'll pick up the dirt at school. They'll pick up all the wicked things in the in the neighborhood. By nature, they will listen to the counsel of the ungodly, but it is our responsibility as parents to give them the counsel of the Lord. And that's the Bible. Now, please don't give the Sunday school teacher the responsibility of teaching your children the Bible or discussing the Bible with them. That's only one hour a week. I trust that every mother and father listening to me spends time in the word of God himself every day. And then seeks to teach the word of God to his children, the nurture of the Lord, the admonition of the Lord.

The word nurture means discipline. Some people don't like the idea of discipline. I was in a store recently where a boy who looked to be about 12 or 13 was pulling his mother around by the nose. She was saying, now, let's go. We have an appointment to keep. I don't want to go. I'm going to stay here. And she threatened and she cajoled and she did everything she could to get that boy out of the store. Well, I know what my mother would have done if I had acted like that at that age. There wouldn't have been any question about who was in control. The word of God says if we spare the rod, we're going to spoil the child. If we love him, we're going to discipline him. We're going to chasten him.

Now, the word of God doesn't teach that we should give to children senseless beatings. I think it's an awful thing when a person in temper tries to discipline a child. That's not discipline, that's punishment. Discipline means discipleship, teaching, learning. Spankings ought to have a purpose behind them and not just simply be letting off steam. The nurture and the admonition of the Lord.

Now, in Ephesians 6:5-9, he talks about workers, servants. Now, of course, back in Paul's day, there were servants in the homes. Most of the homes had servants. They had slaves. And so he says, servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart as unto Christ. Now, there it is again. The wives are to submit themselves, Ephesians 5:22, as unto the Lord. In Ephesians 5:25, husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church. Ephesians 6:1, children are to obey their parents in the Lord. And now he says, servants, you obey your masters in singleness of heart as unto Christ. You're not working for your master on earth, you're working for your master in heaven.

Singleness of heart, that means not a divided heart. Now, the man we work for, the people for whom we work, deserve our complete loyalty. And he says, not with eye service as men pleasers. Eye service means when the boss is watching, we work. A Christian worker ought to be the best worker in the plant. He ought not to be looking for opportunities to loaf or to argue or to get out of work. A Christian worker ought to be the finest worker in the plant or the office or the schoolroom. Not with eye service when people are watching as men pleasers, but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart. You see, the will of God touches every area of our lives. We think of preachers needing to know the will of God. Well, truck drivers need to know the will of God and do the will of God. School teachers need to do the will of God. Pupils need to do the will of God. Doctors and lawyers. Paul is telling us here that regardless of what vocation God has given to you, and I'm speaking, of course, of legitimate vocations. Regardless of what job you may have, you serve Christ. So you drive your truck to please the Lord, and you run your machine to please the Lord, and you study your algebra to please the Lord. Clean your house to please the Lord. You see.

Now, there are two problems he raises. In Ephesians 6:5, he said there's the problem of a divided heart. He said, you you serve the Lord in singleness of heart. I want your service to come from the heart. Ephesians 6:6, doing the will of God from the heart. Now, there are many people who don't have a single heart. They have a divided heart. They don't give their best work. And many people don't even work from the heart. Their heart's not in it. Their heart's not in their work. You know, one of the greatest testimonies a man can give is that of a good workman. A workman that needeth not to be ashamed. Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with all thy might, says the writer in Ecclesiastes 9:10. See thou a man diligent in business, he shall stand before kings, says Proverbs 22:29. Diligent, faithful. Well done, thou good and faithful servant. Enter into the joy of the Lord. I wonder if we work this way.

Ephesians 6:7 says, with good will, doing service as to the Lord and not to man. Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doeth, the same shall he receive of the Lord, whether he be bond or free. This is an amazing thing that a man could be a slave in a household and be serving Jesus Christ. You say, oh, I wish God would call me to the mission field. Oh, why didn't God call me to be a preacher? Well, God's called every one of us to be witnesses, and the best way to witness is to be a good worker.

Now, he turns around in Ephesians 6:9 and talks to the masters. Have you noticed how Paul always turns the coin over? He talks to the wives, then he talks to the husbands. He talks to the children, then he talks to the fathers. He talks to the servants, then he talks to the masters. Everyone has a responsibility. It's not a one-sided affair. And ye masters, do the same things unto them. In other words, you serve the Lord from your heart. You have singleness of heart. Forbearing threatening. The atmosphere between a Christian worker and a Christian master must not be that of threatening. It should be that of love and appreciation. Knowing that your master also is in heaven. Neither is there respect of persons with him. And so, in the everyday relationships of life, the Holy Spirit wants to work. He wants to become a part of breakfast and lunch and dinner. He wants to become a part of vacation. He wants to be a part of housework. The Holy Spirit of God wants to fill us and give us harmony in the home.

Now, may I in the closing minutes of this study review for you those things that bring discord to the home? The first is if members of the family are not submitted to Christ. If there's worldliness or carnality. If the if the family is not praying, if husbands and wives are not praying, if children are not praying, if the word of God is being neglected, then there's going to be discord. If there's lack of discipline in the home, if fathers and mothers are not disciplined as they ought to be. If children are not disciplined as they ought to be, there'll be discord in the home. Now, when the Holy Spirit is at work, there's harmony. Harmony in the home, harmony in the business.

May I in closing remind those of you who work for other people, and this includes most of us, that we have a great responsibility to be Christian leaders in our business. Perhaps you manage a store and have people who work for you. Perhaps you are a school teacher and you have pupils under you. The word of God says you are not serving the school board, you're serving Christ. Your loyalty, your allegiance is to him. And therefore, serve the Lord from the heart.

Now, I like these closing verses because they simplify life. Life is really very simple when you put Jesus Christ first. If one minute you're working for this person and the next minute you're working for that person, there can be conflict. But if we begin every day by saying, Lord, this is the day that you've made. I'm going to serve you today from my heart. And if wherever we go, whatever we are doing, we do it unto the Lord to glorify him, it simplifies life. It takes away the fear of men. It takes away this business of trying to please people. You can't please people, but you can please the Lord. I do always those things that please him. Walk in harmony. Allow the Holy Spirit of God to take possession of your life, to use the word of God in your heart and in your home, that there might be love and reverence and respect and discipline and obedience and joy in your home and in mine. May the Lord help us to walk in harmony through the power of the Holy Spirit.

Shall we pray? Our Father, we thank thee for the indwelling Holy Spirit who enables us to live in harmony. Help us in our homes to be prayerful and joyful and submissive. Help us to obey the word of God and to do the will of God from our hearts so as to please him and make Jesus Christ be glorified in whose name we pray. Amen.